I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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