I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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