i wish starbucks made bloody marys
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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