what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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