i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
