Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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