I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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