Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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