i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
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