careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I think i peed on brittanys purse
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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