There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
