I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
