I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Porn is love you can see.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
