I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
