well he's currently spooning the coffee table
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
