So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
