He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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