Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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