The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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