I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
