The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
