is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
