how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
