I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
