You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize
