I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
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