I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
