You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
