And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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