i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
