No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize
