My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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