The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
