i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
he quoted the bible to break up with me
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Two words: blizzard sex
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Randomize
