are you still at the devil's house?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
