so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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