i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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