She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
