That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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