I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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