and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
