ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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