That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
