Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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