guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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