We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
