After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize