I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
