Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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