whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
