Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
